But a lot of self-help blogs I have been frequenting recently has been talking about switching to reflections on gratitude as a way to cope with anxiety. I know it's bad to say this, but I kind of feel better that I am not the only one feeling scared about the current situation we are all facing. Kind of like having a few people with me on a deserted island.

"What 5 things are you grateful for today? How can you enjoy those feelings of gratitude?"

Since I have been trying so hard to find my calm, I've decided to think of the 5 things that I am grateful for. This morning, I read an article that said, "a deep sense of gratitude can increase happiness, boost immunity, reduce anxiety and depression, and increase feelings of 'connectedness'. Evidence indicates that grateful people are more resilient, have stronger relationships and - wait for it - they also sleep better.".
By constantly thinking about the things I am grateful for, will allow me to focus on the things my mind can grasp on. With the current crisis where things are beyond my control, I need to focus on things that are. I am surrounded by people who love me, and that alone is a good enough reason to be grateful and look forward.

So here are the 5 things I am grateful for today:

GOD. He will always be my number one. God has helped me through a lot in my life, and has given me more things than I actually deserve. He may not have given me the things I asked for during that particular time, but he eventually did and his timing is always impeccable each time. When my daughter was hospitalized when she was only 8 months old, I was a wreck and I was lost in my own mind. As my dad held me in the waiting room of the hospital, dad said, "Just keep the faith. Trust the Higher Power". That stuck to me. And ever since then, it was a mantra I would tell myself every time I get anxious and go on a downward spiral. God keeps me grounded.

My Family. I love my family. Not only do we complement each other, but we have always been each other's support group. It's a good feeling when people love you unconditionally. They accept all of you, inside and out. I have my insecurities and they are the ones who push and encourage me. They ease my doubts and fears, and they celebrate with me when I succeeded. They were there when I was struggling with anxiety and depression... and when those people stay with you, holding your hand through the dark, those are the ones worth keeping.

I woke up this morning. This morning I woke up with air in my lungs and I'm able to spend another day with my loved ones. This is something that I never take for granted. I know that I have neglected my health in the past, and it has caused damage in my body. Realizing that at 40, a new day is a gift to be able to spend another day on earth with my loved ones.

My Job. Ever since I started working, I felt alive. I felt like I had a purpose and I had self-worth. I am so grateful to be working with a group of people who I don't have to pretend with. Although they're a lot younger, they teach me so many things, and are actually more mature in mind and in life than me. They respect my opinions and ideas, and what I can contribute to the team. I love my job. Every morning I feel grateful that I have a job that I enjoy so much. The best part though? I get paid for it.

We have a roof over our heads, and food on the table. I have been truly blessed. I was gifted with a hard working husband, and I was blessed with a good job that allowed us to build our own house. A home. Raul and I work very hard to put food on the table, and we make sure that our children know that as well. Raul and I agreed that we will teach our children that not everything comes for free. To get what you want, you have to work hard for it. I would like my children to grow up grateful not only to us, but most specially to God.
Knowing all of these things, everything else that I worry about seem menial. When I look back on the things that I would get upset about -complaining about the heat, the traffic, or me not being able to go out with my friends to enjoy a good dinner out, I look at the major things that I have been blessed with and all of a sudden, I am uplifted. I can enjoy life knowing that there are bigger things that matter.

The struggle with anxiety is real. There are days when my mind is foggy and gray. It takes me a while to snap out of it to see the bright side of things. When I do though, a montage of the good things in my life flash before my eyes and I am calm.